First Date. Don't Be Late. Part 2

Having no recourse but to ride out the remainder of the ceremony, I made my way back to my seat. I anxiously checked my watch every few seconds or so, hoping that time was miraculously slowing as the pace of the service picked up. With the final remarks and applause, I stood up and began hustling my family towards the door— only to find that milk and cookies had been provided for our enjoyment. My children queued up without a second thought.



I realized that we would be in for another 20 minutes if I didn't do something. I looked at my wife and said, "Is there any way we can take the cookies to go?"

"Why? Is there someplace you need to be?" she responded, obviously thinking that I was behaving like a whiny, frustrated jerk.*

"OK. I'll tell you," I answered. "I called Julia to babysit. She's supposed to be at home, right now. I was planning on surprising you. That's why I was somewhat aloof when I borrowed your phone. I was trying to call her to let her know that we were running late."

Within a moment, it dawned on my wife that she was on the cusp of an evening out, away from the kids. Before I could pull the keys from my pocket, she had the children, cookies in hand, waiting by the car. On the way home, she called the baby sitter's mother (smart thinking) and got the new cell number. Julia had already left our house, assuming that the evening had been cancelled, but was happy to return. I was relieved that my plans had not ended in complete disaster.**

We ended up at our favorite Irish pub, The Hibernian. It's a great place to go on a Sunday night— all pints just $2.75! We had a semi-late dinner and enjoyed watching the Carolina Hurricanes defeat New Jersey in Game 6.*** How cool is that?!





*After almost 9 years of marriage, you start to pick up on these things.

**The only thing worse than neglecting to take your wife out is telling your wife about the grandiose plans you have for the evening and then failing to follow through.

***Yes, my wife appreciates watching the occasional hockey game. So, please don't tear me a new one about taking her to a bar to watch sports on our date.

First Date. Don't be Late. Part 1

OK, to start things off, I decided to take my wife out on a date (simple enough, right?). Even better, I thought I would make the date a surprise. I contacted Julia, our babysitter, and found that she was available on Sunday the 26th. I told her to be at my house at 7:30 and not to mention anything to my wife (it was a surprise after all).

That night, as I had been informed earlier by the wife, me and the Mrs. would be attending an end-of-the-season closing ceremony for our children's program. I had been told it would be over by around 7:30. I thought, "How pleasantly surprised my wife will be when we arrive home afterwards to find our babysitter ready to take over. Wow, what a guy!"

That plan was right on schedule until 7:20. At that point, I realized there was NO WAY this ceremony would be concluded in ten minutes. Not having a cell phone on me, I nonchalantly whispered to my wife, "Let me borrow your phone for a second."
"What do you need my cell phone for?!!! Who are you going to call right now?!!!" she responded in a loud, suspicious tone.
I smiled nervously to everyone who turned and stared in my general direction, then responded,
"I'll tell you later. Just give me your phone!"
I quickly excused myself, stumbled awkwardly down the isle and made for a quiet hallway. Pulling up my wife's contact list, I found "Julia" and hit the send button. "Julia" answered after a few rings.
"Hello?"
"Hey Julia. Sorry to bother you, but we're running a little late. We probably won't be home till around 8:00."
"What? Who is this?" an elderly, somewhat confused voice replied.
"Is this Julia?" I asked slightly embarrassed, assuming I must have hit the wrong contact.
"Yes. This is Julia, but I don't know who you are or what you are talking about," answered the thoroughly senior, thoroughly befuddled voice.
I apologized and hung up. A panicky second query of the contact list showed, to my dismay, no other "Julia" to call.
I was trapped at the ceremony with the clock ticking and no way to contact the babysitter.

Follow the Adventure

Quick Background Info:
I've been married to my wife for going on nine years. I know, you're impressed already. Me too. Now, if you've been married for any length of time past the Margarita-fueled love fest that was your honeymoon, you're doing well for yourself. Let's face it, keeping a marriage going is not as easy as the Hollywood celebrities make it look. It actually involves some significant effort—like maintaining a vehicle. It's easy at first, but before you know it, you've gone 6000 miles without so much as an oil change. And once you start neglecting the routine maintenance, you are heading for a major breakdown.*

Sound familiar ladies? Well, that was me. Yet another lazy, selfish husband neglecting his wife.

So, after the BIG TALK with the Mrs. (guys you know where I'm coming from), I decided to take action.

It's time for me to start pursuing my wife again with a fresh, romantic perspective. You know what I'm talking about— flowers, surprises, poetry, more listening, more attention to her needs, more attention to my personal hygiene— in short, the works.

That said, I invite you to follow along and see what happens. You can root for me to succeed or hope that I fall on my face and end up a humiliated heap of blubbering emasculation. Enjoy!

*Don't worry. I promise not to use any more mechanical analogies. Just trying to make a simple point. Now, let's talk about our feelings.