Little Things To Brighten Her Day: Part 1

Growing up, my father didn’t give me an abundance of advice regarding women. Then again, he may have told me all I would ever need to know when he said, “Son, pay them a lot of attention.” Wise man.

Taking his words to heart, I set out to find several ways to show my wife that she is constantly on my mind. After all, “paying her a lot of attention,” means more than simply muting the TV, turning your head towards her general proximity and then (most importantly) shutting up for long enough to listen. You have to remind her that you are thinking about her, even when you’re not around. Here, I’m referring to notes, little gifts and surprises— loving “fillers” to make her smile and keep you in her good graces until the next big date.

Now, in this economy, my finances are tighter than they’ve ever been. So, I must make every dollar count.* Fortunately, you can create “thinking of you” whatnots for free (or next to nothing). This week I pulled together three items for her to stumble across**— a love note, a piece of chocolate and a certificate for a foot massage. I know, it doesn’t sound very impressive. But, one idea that I’ve found truthful is that it’s better to shower my wife on a regular basis with many small gifts than to present her with the one-time, colossal present. Think I’m wrong? OK, a quick question for the women who’ve been married more than two years: When was the last time you glanced down at that showpiece engagement ring— you know, the one NASA can see from outer space— and then felt all warm, gooey and affectionate towards your husband? Thank you. Like I said, my lady appreciates quantity, not just quality.

The note was simple enough. I took a small piece of paper and wrote about how beautiful she was, how happy I am to have her in my life and how much I love her. I rolled it up and placed it in a miniature decorative bottle that sits upon our kitchen window sill. Now, all that was needed was for her to make the discovery. That didn’t take long and I happened to be there when she found it.
“Is that for me?” she said, motioning towards the container and beaming with a tiny, Mona Lisa smile. I nodded and she went to retrieve the message. Of course, by this point, the paper had long since unrolled and removing it through the narrow glass opening proved more tedious for her than I had expected. Long story short, she finally got it out. Though it now appeared somewhat crinkled and ripped, she told me it was sweet. Feeling pleased with her response, I made a mental note to hide the next surprise in a place with easier access. So, I buried the chocolate in her underwear drawer.*** There, I could be confident she would venture at least once a day.

*I’m sure you think that money should be no object when it comes to love and romance. But, don’t forget that we are married. If I was single, then liquidating my 401K in pursuit of love would be a grand gesture worthy of a Hallmark Channel movie-of-the-week. If I did that now, however, I would be spending money that belongs to her as well. And as much as my wife enjoys being doted on, she also cherishes the idea of not having to live on the street during her golden years.

**I like to hide the little “thinking of you” stuff in a place where she won‘t immediately notice, but is still likely to come across eventually. I have to remind myself though, that my goal is for her to actually find the items. This may seem obvious, but never forget just how stupid a man can be. Nothing says, “My husband is an idiot,” like her finding tickets to the symphony— two weeks after the show was performed.

***The trick with planting something in your wife’s panty drawer is to make sure she is not around when you do it. I mean, she needs to be totally away from the house— just to be safe. Even if your intentions are noble, it just feels downright unseemly to be caught rooting through your wife’s unmentionables.